


2am

by yanori



Category: GOT7
Genre: Angst, College, Confusion, Drugs, M/M, Night, Nighttime, Parties, Reunion, Short Story, awkward reunion, drunk, intentional lowercase, odd meetings, this is sad i’m so sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 11:24:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17079413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yanori/pseuds/yanori
Summary: there was nothing really special about the night mark met jackson except for the fact that he met him.*****in which mark sees a lonely, drunk, crying man walking the streets at 2am and offers him a ride. at first, he doesn’t know if he should regret it or not. but of course, no one really ever regrets meeting jackson wang once they know him– and mark certainly doesn’t.





	1. Jackson

there was nothing really special about the night mark met jackson except for the fact that he met him. 

it was a dark, like any other night would be at 2am. the only thing that led the way were the old street lamps along the street, illuminating nothing but the lines on the road and the occasional car. really no one else besides mark was driving around the neighborhood at 2am. 

he didn’t mind, though. he really didn’t. he liked being by himself, and while he could handle people just fine and he was decently social, being alone was his favorite. so when he was driving by himself, listening to the radio and cruising down the street back towards his house, he was content. 

he was coming back from one of his friend’s parties. they were in college, but he still lived at his mom and dad’s house- and they were hella rich. there was a decent amount of people there, and although the place wasn’t completely crowded the whole time, it made the relaxing ride home a lot more peaceful to mark. 

he hadn’t drank, so even though it was late, he’d left around 1:30. and looking back on it, he was glad that he left at exactly the right time. but that night, he wasn’t sure what to think. 

as he drove, he wasn’t expecting to see the silhouette of a figure on the sidewalk, illuminated by one of the street lights. the figure was hard to miss, considering the fact that virtually no one else was out, and mark couldn’t help but slow his car down in curiosity. that was his first mistake. 

it took a moment for his eyes to adjust, because the figure’s head was hung low and shadows enveloped him. but he looked up as mark slowly drove forward, trying to get a better look. and when he was close enough, he noticed that the figure was a shaky, stumbling man walking. 

at that point, the situation had become slightly awkward. mark was tired, and looking back on it, he probably shouldn’t have been slowing down to stare at an odd man out on the streets at 2am. but he did, and he stopped as he got close enough to the man, not wanting him to accidentally stumble in front of his car and give them both bigger problems to deal with than he was sure that he nor the man wanted to handle.

he couldn’t just leave now. the man had looked at him already, and he didn’t want to be that one awkward and rude guy who was eating mcdonald’s and caught eyes with a beggar and then immediately looked away. besides, this guy seemed kind of lost, and even though mark wasn’t the best with dealing with these situations, he wanted to make sure the guy was okay. that was the least he could do. he could be a good citizen, right? he could do something nice for a stranger without crumbling into the odd, confused shell he fell into far too many times with situations like this. 

so he rolled down his window. he moved in his seat a little bit, allowing for his torso to hang out of his window as he called out to the man who had now dropped his gaze, even though mark had stopped a few feet in front of him. “umm, excuse me? sir, are you okay?”

he mentally cringed at himself because he knew he sounded unsure. but the closer the boy got, the even more he felt like maybe this wasn’t so much of a good idea. it was 2am. what if this was some creep waiting for an opportunity like this? 

but then the man looked up. mark’s headlights and the streetlights illuminated his face, revealing red, watery eyes. his cheeks shined due to the wetness on them, probably from tears. he seemed so obviously distraught, but he looked straight at mark, letting out a watery chuckle and giving him a small smile. when he spoke, his words were slurred, but mark could understand him just fine. 

“yeah, i’m okay. just, yanno,” the man sniffled, “taking a short stroll.”

mark furrowed his brows, slumping against his car door and watching as the man stopped once he was about three yards in front of him. like he was afraid to get close or something. it was odd because he seemed to be decently friendly enough, but at least that meant that he didn’t seem to have the intention of kidnapping mark or robbing him. that set him at ease. 

“are you sure?” mark asked, his concern for this random man growing a bit. based on the way his words sounded, he had to be drunk, or at least tipsy. he had been stumbling when he was walking, and even as he stood still, he shook. “i don’t think it’s a good idea to take a walk this late at night.”

the man seemed to pause. he took a breath and went to answer, but then paused again. his lip quivered, and mark immediately felt like he had said something wrong. he must’ve. 

“yeah,” the man answered, nodding finally after a moment of silence. his words came out in a form of a sob though, and pretty soon he was crying again and shaking worse than before as he spoke. “you’re right. i’m not taking a walk, anyway..”

mark had never been particularly impulsive. but the sight of this man crying like this broke his heart, and he didn’t really think things through before he spoke. “oh.. do you need a ride somewhere, then? i can take you somewhere if you need me to.” 

“no, it’s okay. you probably have somewhere to be. really, i’m not that important. i’ll just… i’ll find somewhere on my own. i’ll go.. i’ll go somewhere.” the man trailed off and made less sense the more he talked. but from what mark did gather, he definitely needed to go somewhere, and if he had to take some time to figure that out, that was fine. but he wasn’t going to leave this crying, drunken boy walking on the streets alone right here. 

so he got out of his car and walked over to him, slinging an arm around him and starting to lead the guy towards the passenger seat of his car without a word. and the man thankfully didn’t protest, leaning against mark and continuing to cry, not stopping even as he was set in the passenger seat and mark shut the door gently behind him. 

mark walked back around to sit in the driver’s seat then, turning to the man and pursing his lips. he could see him more clearly now, and before he said anything, he examined him for a moment. 

the guy had his head in his hands, but mark could see that he was extremely muscular and he had “an inch of gold cannot buy an inch of time” etched in chinese in the form of a tattoo on the nape of his neck. when he leaned back and out of his hands finally, mark could see his face, and he couldn’t imagine that the guy was much older than him. he seemed relatively the same age, and once mark deemed his examination enough, he let out a small sigh and spoke. 

“what’s your name?” he asked, pursing his lips again afterwards as he watched the man sniffle and look back up at him with puffy eyes. he seemed to think for a minute, but it wasn’t necessarily weird, considering he was drunk, so mark didn’t think much of it. 

“jackson,” the man said, reaching up to wipe and rub at his eyes for a moment before averting his gaze and looking distantly at the road in front of them, “my name’s jackson.” 

mark nodded, letting out a small sigh and turning to follow the man’s– jackson’s– gaze, just in case he was looking at something mark needed to pay attention to. when he found nothing and no one, though, he wasn’t surprised. he just looked back at jackson, waiting a moment before speaking again. “where do you need to go? do you have somewhere you can go?”

he didn’t know what he was going to do if jackson didn’t have somewhere to go, but he knew it was insensitive to assume that he did. he was random guy, walking the streets and drunk at 2am. mark wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t have a place to go, either.

but jackson shrugged before beginning to cry again, shaking his head and pulling his knees up into the seat. he hugged them to his chest, resting his head between them and still crying as he answered, his voice coming out muffled. “i just want to go to my parents. i want to see my mom and dad.” 

mark knew jackson had to be horribly distressed. he couldn’t seem to help but cry practically every time mark asked him a question, and mark sighed, knowing he had to ask another one. he needed to know where to take jackson before he could drive anywhere. were his parents still alive? maybe that’s why he was so upset. it might be insensitive to ask, but mark had to know. he just wanted to get jackson somewhere safe.

“where do your parents live? i can take you to them if you need me to.” mark said, feeling half guilty for answering the question if his suspicions were right. 

but jackson lifted his head, glancing around for a moment before sniffling and stuffing a hand in the pocket of his sweatshirt. mark was unsure of what he was doing and he would admit, he was afraid for a moment, but jackson didn’t reveal a gun or anything. he just pulled out his phone before holding it out and over the console for mark to take. 

“i can’t remember right now. it’s on my phone somewhere.” jackson’s words were slurred between the obvious consumption of alcohol and his crying, and mark wondered if he knew what he was doing. he certainly wouldn’t have handed his phone over to some stranger. but nonetheless, he needed to know. he needed to take this crying man somewhere, so he took the phone and turned it on. he was preparing himself to ask for jackson’s passcode as he slid to the side, but before he did, he examined his lock screen. 

it was a picture of jackson and some girl who seemed oddly familiar. he knew he had probably seen her around the university, and it confirmed his thoughts that jackson must be around the same age, because he was kissing her in the picture. it was a sweet image, but mark couldn’t bring himself to stare for long because it really wasn’t his business. besides, he felt kind of jealous of the happy relationship it seemed the two shared. it was hard for mark to find someone that he wanted to be with and was happy with like that. he’d never been particularly good at romantic feelings and all that. he never conversed his feelings enough, a lot of his previous girlfriends and boyfriends had said. they weren’t wrong, but they also didn’t necessarily really ever understand them or mark himself. he just wished he could have someone who understood him and trusted him. he wanted someone who he could have a relationship like that with. 

he couldn’t dwell on that thought now though, and he knew he couldn’t. it wasn’t the time nor place nor the right atmosphere to be pitying himself when jackson was so upset. so he opened his mouth just slightly to ask for the passcode as he slid over, but he didn’t have to. the phone opened easily, no passcode barrier popping up. 

it was different. mark honestly didn’t think he knew anyone who didn’t have a passcode on their phone, but he was thankful for it, because jackson was staring out the window again and crying silently and shaking, and mark didn’t want to bother him. so he just went straight to jackson’s contacts, not wanting to do any more snooping and take advantage of jackson’s trust. he was just going to get the boy to his parents like he wanted. 

mark was a slightly surprised when he noticed that all of jackson’s contacts were written in mandarin. he wasn’t horribly shaken, though, as he could still read them and it wasn’t like jackson didn’t already have a tattoo in the language on him that mark had caught. it must’ve been his native language, or something. either way, in this instance, mark was just glad he had taken up learning chinese on top of korean once he’d moved here.

he did some scrolling through his contacts, assuming that jackson couldn’t have many before he reached his parents, but mark was surprised when it took him more than a minute to even get through the first bit of the list. jackson was obviously a popular guy, and he didn’t waste much more time on it before he just fell to the mercy of the search bar at the top of the screen. he looked up “mom” first, and he was glad that the first thing that popped up in his search was “mom & dad” instead of a different contact of just someone who had been nicknamed “mom” (he’d accidentally called a friend’s friend before when he misunderstood that. just because the contact said ‘mom’, it did not always mean it was the person’s actual mother).

he clicked on it, hoping that the contact would have an address attached or else he really would have to poke around and ask jackson more questions. but before he could really check, jackson spoke. 

“you know, i’ve never really looked at a dude this way before, but you’re oddly pretty. like a knightly kind of pretty.”

mark froze. 

what did he just say? 

“like, you look like a handsome, pretty, knight fairy. or a handsome pretty night knight fairy. cause it’s night, you know. and i met you in the night, and you’re kind of acting like a knight to me now…” 

mark didn’t know what to say. jackson was obviously still drunk. but when he was drunk, did it make him more brutally honest, or delusional? mark honestly didn’t know if the boy honestly thought that or if he was just being borderline crazy (of course his mind automatically believed the second suggestion more so than the first). 

“um.. thanks?” mark mumbled, glancing up from the phone to look at jackson in a side gaze. but with the way jackson was looking at him, it was hard to think that his brain was just confusing him. he didn’t seem confused. he seemed as sure as ever, staring at mark, and mark could see his eyes drag across every feature on his face. it was kind of uncomfortable, but also endearing. it wasn’t scary, just… different and unexpected. and slightly embarrassing, making mark’s cheeks turn a light shade of pink. 

jackson didn’t speak for a moment. he just gaze at jackson with that awestruck look before he spoke. “you’re welcome.” 

and then he smiled and looked away again, sniffling even though he seemed to have been put in a better mood just by admitting his inner thoughts to mark. which mark didn’t necessarily mind, he guessed, but he was definitely caught off guard by them. 

when he looked back down at jackson’s phone, he was confused as to what he was looking for, at first. all he could think about as why a random, drunken man would be walking the streets crying. why he would get in the car voluntarily with an awkward stranger and give him an unlocked phone to find the address to his parents with? why he would compliment mark when mark was rarely complimented or flirted with because of his standoffish behavior in public with people he didn’t know? but he found his task again after a moment of thought, thankful to see that jackson’s parents’ address was in fact in the “address” box on his phone. 

it was decently far. it was back the way mark had just come from, but he didn’t mind. as long as he got jackson home safe and he got home eventually he really didn’t mind going the extra mile. especially after he felt kind of endeared by jackson’s sweet– although definitely drunken– comment. so he pulled the car out of park, moving from the spot on the side of the road where he had stopped and turning around in the middle of the road. it’s not like anyone was there to hit him or watch or give him a ticket for breaking the road rules anyway. 

he didn’t know why he had decided to stop for this man. he was causing mark to go out of his way quite a bit already, but mark didn’t feel burdened by it. he just wanted to help jackson get home and be safe, and even though it was out of character because mark tried to avoid awkward situations at all cost, he wasn’t regretting stopping and helping jackson. someone needed to, or else he was sure that jackson would be making it to where he needed to go. he was just glad that he had instead of nobody else. who knows what else could’ve happened? it scared mark to think about, because jackson seemed like a genuinely nice guy– no matter how weird his statements were, even while drunk.

“my parents are probably going to be mad at me.” jackson mumbled. it had been quiet for a few minutes after mark had turned back, and he’d been so focused on driving that he hadn’t realized it was jackson who had spoken. but once he did, he furrowed his brows, unsure of what to say. so he didn’t. he just stayed silent, waiting for jackson to continue. “they told me i shouldn’t move in with her, you know. i’m so stupid. they’re going to be mad.” 

mark glanced over for a second. he didn’t know why jackson was unloading this on him all of a sudden, but then again, jackson obviously didn’t seem to be very cautious around strangers. if mark had learned anything from him, it was that. 

“what do you mean?” mark asked softly, not wanting to intrude, but taking his comments as the opportunity to. he thought maybe jackson wanted to rant. maybe jackson was saying this because he wanted to talk about it, not just because he was drunk.

“chaeyoung. they told me that she wasn’t good for me. but i loved her. i really loved her.” jackson said, and as mark chanced a glance over at jackson one more time, he could tell he was on the verge of tears again. “she was never mean or anything. we just never really got along. we couldn’t get along. but god, i loved her.” 

jackson started to cry again. mark had never seen someone who cried so much when they were drunk, but he felt bad that jackson seemed to be that way. he seemed like such a gentle, sweet, trusting soul. mark didn’t know him well, but he didn’t know that he already didn’t like to see him cry. 

“she kicked me out. we got in a fight because i was stupid again and she kicked me out. i can’t believe she kicked me out..” jackson trailed off, letting out a sob, and mark bit his lip. he wondered what could make this chaeyoung girl want to kick out a sensitive guy like this, but he guessed he couldn’t question it too much. he didn’t know jackson, really. 

but he also didn’t know what he was supposed to do. he was driving. he couldn’t pull over and stop to comfort jackson. it was 2am. he needed to get jackson home so he could go to sleep and be in a decent mindset tomorrow to deal with all of this. but he did speak. he didn’t know much about relationships, but he wanted to bring some kind of comfort to jackson. anything. so he spoke. “hey, it’s okay, just try to calm down. i can’t imagine your parents would be mad at you for getting dumped.” 

mark didn’t know his parents, sure. but from the way that jackson had cried about wanting them earlier, they had to be some important source of comfort for him. so mark couldn’t imagine that they wouldn’t support him and be there for him if he was really struggling. 

“i just don’t want them to be mad at me. i couldn’t take that too.” jackson said pitifully, shaking with small cries. mark glanced over again and felt his heart break for him. 

“it’ll be okay,” was all mark could manage as he continued driving. he wasn’t going to make empty promises, no matter how bad he wanted to comfort this man. he didn’t know jackson. he knew nothing of his life other than the bit he’d just told him and his lock screen– which must of been of him and ‘chaeyoung’. he just hoped that a promise of ‘it’ll be okay’ would be enough, and that it would be true. 

the rest of the ride was spent in silence after that. jackson never really stopped crying, but mark didn’t mind that much. he knew that he was upset, and he didn’t blame him. so he never even thought of asking jackson to stop, driving him all the way back to the address that was supposedly jackson’s parents’ house and stopping in front of it. the driveway was open, but mark thought that parking there would be a bit intrusive, too, so he just stopped at the edge of the road. 

but when he really looked up at the house, he was surprised. 

jackson’s parents definitely weren’t short of money, that much mark could tell. the house was huge, and from what mark could see, it had two decently large stories to it. the windows were huge, although curtains were draped over them for privacy. the front yard was nice, bushes and various flowers decorating it and making it look more than decently presentable. the garage was large, too, and mark wondered how many cars could fit in it. but when he looked back at jackson, he didn’t seem as anxious to go in as mark would have been in his position. 

mark could tell jackson was scared. he could see it all over his face as tears continued to roll down his cheeks. he was scared and upset, and mark watched him for a moment, trying to figure out what to do. if it had been anyone else, he would’ve kicked them out and driven off, anxious to get out of the weird situation. but something made him care more about jackson. he wanted to help him. so after a minute of thought, he spoke. 

“i can wait here if you want,” mark said, giving jackson a small smile when he turned to look back, “and then if it doesn’t go well you can come back out here and we can figure out what to do.” 

he wanted to make sure jackson was okay and safe. he knew it was a bit extra to wait and make sure jackson’s life for the night would be going fine, but he couldn’t help it. something drew him to jackson. something made him want to care. 

jackson immediately lit up. he wasn’t completely cheery, of course, but mark could see some of the fear leave his gaze. he nodded. “you’d do that?” 

“yeah. i don’t mind. i’ll just wait out here for ten minutes. if you don’t come back, i’ll assume everything’s okay, and i’ll go. does that sound good?” mark suggested, and he was happy when jackson nodded and sniffled, taking in a deep breath as he turned and opened the door. before he fully got out, though, he turned to mark one last time. 

“promise you’ll wait?” he asked, seeming afraid of mark leaving instead of his parents for the first time since he’d mentioned it. 

mark chuckled lightly, nodding. “i wouldn’t suggest it if i was going to leave, would i?” 

jackson just smiled a little wider at the reassurance before getting out, shutting the door behind him carefully and then taking short strides towards the front door. it was obvious that he was still nervous and scared, mark could tell, but he went on anyway. he grabbed a spare key from one of the gnomes in the front yard and unlocked the door, taking one last glance at mark and giving him a teary smile before entering the house. 

and mark waited the whole ten minutes and a bit longer, just to be sure. it was 2:45 before he really left, but he didn’t mind. he was only happy to be reassured that jackson was safe, and once he was content, he finally turned back around in the road and headed back towards his apartment. 

he didn’t even remember that he hadn’t told jackson his name– all he knew was that jackson’s name was playing on repeat in his head until he got home and fell asleep.


	2. Mark

jackson hadn’t forgotten about the mysterious boy who picked him up that night. how could he? even after the alcohol had worn off, he couldn’t get the face or the voice or the comforting words from the guy out of his head. 

jackson had never thought about being attracted to boys before, honestly. he didn’t know if he could even consider this attraction, exactly. maybe it was more.. fascination..? but nonetheless, whatever it was, jackson wanted to find this boy. jackson didn’t even know his name, but he’d helped him when he was in a pinch, and looking back on it, he was glad that he had volunteered to take him home because he knew being drunk and alone and wandering around in that part of town wasn’t the best idea. 

yet he couldn’t find him anywhere. after classes he would wander around campus for a while to see if the boy maybe went to the same college and they would run into one another again. he would keep a lookout when he went out with friends and he glanced around at almost every table every time he went to a restaurant, just to make sure. he wanted to find this boy and he wanted to thank him and he wanted to have more of a connection to him. he didn’t want to be a random, drunk boy who had taken advantage of his kindness that night. he wanted to show him that he was grateful- but of course no matter how much he looked, he couldn’t find him anywhere. jackson was pretty sure he never hated anything more.

he liked to leave lasting impressions on people, yes, but the right ones. every time he met someone, he did his best to be pleasant and kind and show them that he was a good person. he wanted people to look back at him and believe that he was a good person. that boy had none of that, and god, did jackson want him to. 

but nonetheless, life still went on. jackson ended up staying with his parents for far longer than he even expected, struggling to get back up on his feet. chaeyoung made it difficult for him to grab his own belongings from their previously shared apartment. he was still forced to pay half the rent for that month because he had left only right after it had to be paid. he’d lost his job before chaeyoung broke up with him- one of the reasons for their argument- and now he couldn’t put himself together long enough to apply for another. it was just one struggle after another, and if jackson was being honest, he felt like he was drowning. 

so maybe, just maybe, looking for the mysterious boy was some form of keeping himself afloat. 

he figured he could knock two birds out with one stone when he was invited to one of his friend’s parties one night. there’d be a lot of people there from all around, and there’d be more alcohol. jackson loved a cold can to crack open when he was upset, and the company from so many people would definitely help. so he went. 

the moment he got there, he was greeted with more than he expected. there were so many people he knew and so many that he hadn’t seen in ages. it was refreshing, and jackson was easily sucked into the action and excitement. he hadn’t even had a lot to drink, honestly. just the company and a few sips was enough to make him feel pretty enlightened, and for a little while, his goal of trying to find the boy from several nights before was tucked into the back of his mind.

it wasn’t there for long, though. amidst all the talking and loud laughter, someone caught jackson’s eye from his peripheral. he almost missed him, really. the boy was moving fast, but jackson couldn’t have forgotten that slim frame and the silver shimmer of his hair. 

immediately, he excused himself. it was so abrupt and random and he and his friends had been right in the middle of conversation, but he couldn’t let it slide. he couldn’t let this mysterious man slip in between his fingers when he had spent so long obsessing over finding him. so he turned his shoulder forward and slunk between the stiff yet unsteady bodies of his friends, fighting against the crowded setting to follow the silver tufts of hair he could see in between shoulders and outstretched hands and beer bottles. 

he didn’t even realize where the boy was taking him until they got there. he disappeared behind a doorframe and jackson unknowingly followed, unaware of exactly where they were until he turned and saw the boy collapsed in front of the toilet, heaving into the toilet bowl. his face was red and he seemed really shaky, so unlike the same man that jackson had met in the car the other night. it felt so odd to see their positions almost reversed, but jackson couldn’t do nothing. he wouldn’t do nothing, even if he felt awkward standing here and invading on the boy’s privacy when he was hurling. 

so he moved forward and approached the boy, crouching next to him and resting a hand on his back so he would know that he was here. he debated shutting the door for the guy’s privacy since there were so many people here, but he knew that could seem weird, so he decided against it. it wasn’t like the majority of the people were sober enough to really notice anyway. 

the boy tensed at the touch at first, though. he coughed and stiffened, his eyes immediately shooting to the side to see who the intruder was. but as soon as the they seemed to lock eyes he relaxed again, shaking his head and coughing a bit more freely this time. 

jackson stayed silent for a while. he stayed quiet until the boy seemed to be done, not wanting to be rude or intrusive since he was already being that way enough anyway. but he had to admit, it did feel nice. it felt nice to be there beside someone who had been beside him through an even harder time, and it felt nice to be trusted enough to be here. 

so he waited until he saw the man lift his head and begin to sit up from his slouched position. he must have really been slumped, though, because the moment he sat up, he was falling backwards weakly, and jackson quickly reached forward to pull him back against his chest. he didn’t want him to hit anything or hurt himself, and that was the main purpose, really. but the warmth from the body in front of him that collided with him was comforting and he felt secure– even if he wasn’t the one physically being secured and he was still terrified for the boy’s health. 

he looked down at him once he was sure he was out of harm’s way, his eyes wide from the sudden movement of it all, and met the tired eyes of the other boy who didn’t even attempt to move from his grip. he seemed oddly calm, something jackson had admired about him from the moment he had asked if he needed a ride that night. 

“are you okay?” jackson finally spoke, keeping his voice quiet, but loud enough so the boy would hear him over the loud music in the background. he didn’t look okay at all, but if this really was nothing to worry about, he wanted to know. if it was just a hangover or something, he could handle it. he just wanted to be sure. 

the boy in his arms just chuckled quietly, closing his eyes for a moment before taking a deep breath, opening them again, and then responding. “i don’t know. probably not.”

jackson smiled at the answer, and even though not being okay wasn’t good, the fact that the other boy didn’t seem too worried helped to ease his own overwhelming worry for him. “what happened? did you drink too much?”

the boy shook his head, coughing lightly and then furrowing his brows in concentration. the expression only lasted for a moment before it relaxed, though, and jackson pursed his lips in concern as he answered. “no. i’ve only had one drink.” 

jackson tilted his head slightly in confusion, continuing to watch the boy carefully as he closed his eyes once again, letting his head lull to the side and his cheek gently rest against jackson’s bicep. it was oddly handsome– the way his soft hair was splayed across jackson’s tan skin and his lips were parted ever so slightly, taking breaths in and breaths out, focused and precise, yet relaxed. the position was oddly comfortable, and jackson found he really didn’t mind it or the sight in front of him, so he let it be. he was more concerned as to what could be causing the boy such trouble than he was his current thoughts.

“what do you think it was, then?” he asked. 

“i dunno. my dumbass friends probably put something in my drink.” the boy answered without moving, and he seemed to want to continue but had to pause, his face contorting in concentration once more before relaxing as he let out another breath. “it wouldn’t be above them.” 

immediately, jackson felt anger slipping in. who’s friends would do this to them? this boy was obviously feeling terrible, and his friends hadn’t even rushed after him. they couldn’t have cared about much other than their satisfaction, knowing that they’re cruel prank had worked. who did something like that?

“huh. some friends they are, then.” he mumbled under his breath, glancing towards the door as if they were there. just to see if he had the chance to dig into them right now. sadly though, they weren’t, and when jackson went to look back at the boy slumped in his arms, he looked like he was already dozing off. he shook him lightly. “hey, don’t fall asleep on me… i’m pretty sure you don’t want to fall asleep here.” 

the boy’s face scrunched up in response for a moment, and for a while, jackson wondered if he would even open his eyes again. but after another few seconds, he finally did, blinking a few times, even though it didn’t stop the dropping of his eyelids or clear up the croaking of his voice. “yeah. i know.” 

jackson pursed his lips again, feeling at a loss for words. he knew the boy couldn’t fall asleep here. he knew the guy knew that, too. but where else was he supposed to take him? just leaving him in a bedroom here didn’t sound like a good idea. not alone, at least but jackson didn’t think they’d be allowed to spend the night here. they’d be kicked out at some point, and he could tell that once he found this boy a comfortable place to rest, he wouldn’t want to move. 

“do you have someplace i could take you? is your place nearby?” jackson asked quietly, watching as the boy stared blankly at the sink cabinet in front of them before looking back up at him and shrugging lightly. 

“my apartment is 10 minutes away.” he answered weakly, nodding. jackson didn’t need much more convincing other than that, carefully and slowly lifting the boy up and holding him securely close to him. 

“i’ll take you home then, okay? you have a way of getting in, right?” jackson asked, just to be sure. he didn’t want to take him all the way there for nothing.

“i have a key.” he answered simply, and jackson nodded, needing no further affirmation. he just nodded before shuffling out of the bathroom and back into the commotion, turning and making a beeline for the back door. he knew it would be the easiest way out without issue. 

the man seemed to stay relaxed in his arms, at least. he didn’t seem to be uptight, or stiff. he didn’t seem to mind jackson’s actions, so jackson tried not to think about it. 

keyword, tried.

it was hard not to think about it. he still remembered how fascinating he had found the boy the night they met. he remembered how handsome he had looked, even in a baggy t-shirt and ripped jeans. he remembered how attractive he thought the man was when he drove. he remembered how safe he had felt– he didn’t even feel like the boy had been a stranger, just helping him out. he felt comfortable and calm, even if it was just for a few, drunken and flighting moments. 

he had that effect on jackson. this boy, who he still didn’t even know the name of, made jackson feel sound, and it was hard to ignore that. 

it didn’t feel wrong to hold him like this. jackson even found himself adjusting the boy to hold him closer, and he didn’t feel awkward about it. it felt natural, and he felt his heartbeat quicken when the boy’s head came to rest in the crook of his neck, his nose poking gently at his throat. something about it was right, and jackson didn’t try to combat that thought as he slipped out the back door with the boy, moving quickly yet steadily to his car, not wanting to upset the boy’s stomach anymore than it surely already was.

he felt a bit disappointed when he opened the passenger door to his car, but he knew it was best to get the boy home quickly. so he didn’t hold on longer like he wanted to. he just set the man carefully in the seat, buckling his seatbelt for him and giving him a little smile when his droopy eyes met jackson’s before gently shutting the door. 

jackson felt good about this. his feelings about the boy himself were spinning in his head and he didn’t really know what to make of them, but he knew that helping this boy get home felt like a move in the right direction. if nothing else, he was helping him out after the man had done the exact same for him. 

he got into the driver’s seat quickly, wanting to make sure the man got home asap. he didn’t know exactly what his friends had put in his drink, and even though the guy didn’t seem too concerned about, jackson wanted to make sure he was comfortable and in a safe place soon. so he started up the car and pulled off the curb where he had parked, starting to head out of the neighborhood. 

“could you plug your complex address into my phone’s gps? i know you probably don’t want to be giving me directions the whole way.” jackson asked, quickly glancing down from the road just to pull out his phone and open his gps app, holding it out for the other boy before returning his gaze to where it was supposed to be. he did his best to ignore the brush of their fingers when he felt the phone disappear from his grasp. 

he heard only a few keyboard clicks from his phone before he noticed the boy set it down in a cup holder in his peripheral, and he smiled and said a quick thanks before taking a right turn as the gps instructed.

the first 3 minutes of the ride was silent. jackson wanted to speak, and he had several questions to ask, but he didn’t want to break the silence when he felt like it was probably there for a reason. he was sure the other man was tired and still feeling quite sick, so he let it be. until the other boy spoke up first.

“i’m sorry.” was all he muttered at first, and jackson almost wanted to laugh. what did he have to be sorry for?

“what do you mean?” jackson asked incredulously. “you have nothing to be sorry for. it’s not your fault that you’re sick, and i owe you one anyway.” 

jackson could see the boy shrug, and he pursed his lips. how could he feel bad about this? it wasn’t like he had drugged his own drink. it wasn’t like he wanted to be sick. jackson was more glad to be helping than he would have been otherwise. 

“seriously. you saved my ass that night. i owe you.” jackson repeated, taking a quick glance at the boy who had let his tired eyes drag across the scenery outside his window. he moved his head to meet jackson’s eyes for a split second before jackson looked back to the road in front of him.

“i wasn’t going to just leave you there.” the boy answered, like it was no big deal. but it did feel like a big deal to jackson, and it had ever since.

“just like i’m not going to leave you now.” jackson answered easily as he took another commanded by the gps. “you could have left me just as easily as i could drop you off on the side of the road right now. but you didn’t, and i won’t. i don’t want to.”

there was silence for a minute again. jackson figured it was just the boy didn’t know how to respond, though, because he could feel the eyes on him. he could tell that the man was watching him, but not in a judgemental way. in a soothing kind of way, that jackson didn’t even know was possible. so he just glanced over at the boy again, meeting his gaze once again with flitting eyes.

“what’s your name?” he asked, finally bringing himself to ask the simple question, reminiscing about the time the boy had asked him when they were in the opposite position before. 

“mark,” the man answered simply, his eyes never leaving jackson, “my name’s mark.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bahaha i finally finished this chapterrr.
> 
> gotta love those good ol’ feelsy music playlists. ;)
> 
> anyway!!! i’m so sorry for the long wait, but i hope it was worth it! i wanted this chapter to be the absolute best that it could be, and i think i rewrote it enough times to be satisfied. thank you for your patience!


	3. 2am

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m sorry for this. that’s all i have to say.

mark didn’t know what he was doing. he was stuck in a lazy, tired daze, undoubtedly due to his friends dumb party tricks. it wouldn’t be the first time they’d snuck something in someone’s drink, and it was definitely not the first time they’d tried to sneak something in mark’s drink. he was just usually smart enough to avoid it when they tried. he guessed he wasn’t smart enough today. which he couldn’t really blame on himself. 

his brother had kept him up practically all night yesterday. joey had been hanging out with friends at a skatepark late at night, and of course when his friend said pushed him and he fell and busted his head, mark was his go to. mark couldn’t ever say no, especially not to his little brother. so he took him to the hospital and he sat there until he was stitched up and ready to go, finally leaving in the early morning. mark had a class that morning.

nothing ever seemed to go right for mark. he’d sort of grown to accept it, but it didn’t really make it suck any less. he’d agreed to party tonight anyway, even though he was dead tired. and that was what had led him to the current situation. 

jackson’s car smelled like those pine air fresheners you could pick up in a convenience store. he had a little cardboard christmas tree hanging from the rear view mirror, and when mark wasn’t busy admiring jackson or looking out the window, he spent some of his time watching it. it would sway back and forth until he started to feel nauseous and had to look at something else. 

nothing about today had gone right, but somehow, mark didn’t feel bad about this. there was something that told him that jackson wouldn’t let this go bad. something told him he could trust this boy, and even if he didn’t, what other choice did he have? it wasn’t like he had anyone else to turn to. 

jackson’s words had comforted him, though. jackson wouldn’t throw him off on the side of the road and leave him to rot. he had said he wouldn’t, and he said he didn’t even want to. jackson seemed honest, and his embrace before had given mark more comfort than he’d felt in a long time. he believed him. 

mark didn’t speak for the rest of the car ride. jackson didn’t either, which surprised mark a bit. he had been so talkative when mark had picked him up that night, but tonight he seemed so focused. he was thoughtful and somber, watching the road carefully while periodically trapping his bottom lip between his teeth and letting go of it again. 

jackson was handsome. mark had noticed that the first night they met, but he could see more clearly now that he was in the opposite position. he could see the way his eyes glowed when they passed street lights. the way his face would light up and then the shadows would fall again, illuminating every detail and then hiding them all a moment later. he could see even the smallest tensing of his muscles, and he admired it. he wished he could be that strong.

he could understand why jackson had made the comments he had made while he was drunk that night. mark didn’t even have to be drunk to feel like jackson was his knight in shining armor, and god, was he handsome. 

mark was unlike jackson in that fact that he didn’t say anything about it, though. whether that was because he was too shy or because of the fluctuating nausea, he wasn’t sure. but it was okay. mark was never one to verbally announce his feelings, anyway.

it didn’t take that long to reach mark’s apartment, mark was sure of it, but it felt like forever. although he was partly distracted by the sight and the presence of jackson, his stomach never stopped twisting and churning, and the burning of the bile in the back of his throat didn’t go away. it lingered and it didn’t lose its fervor, and by the time jackson parked, mark felt like he was going to throw up again. 

“are you able to get up and walk inside by yourself..?” jackson asked quietly, sounding a bit unsure. mark wasn’t unsure, though. he knew he couldn’t make it inside by himself without hurling or passing out– whichever would come first. so he shook his head lightly, feeling relieved when jackson immediately got out of the driver’s seat and started making his way around to mark’s side. 

the fresh air that hit mark when jackson opened the door was soothing, at least. it helped ease the heat that he didn’t even realize he felt. but when jackson started to lift him up and out of his seat, mark had to use all he had in him not to vomit. the movement felt horrible, and the moment he was out of the car, he didn’t even let jackson lift his feet up to carry him. he just held onto his shoulder tightly and stumbled forward towards the grass, dry heaving into the air and coughing at the intense burning in his throat that increased. 

he didn’t know how long they’d stayed like that. he definitely wasn’t keeping track, but jackson held him the whole time. he kept him up and didn’t say a word, and mark appreciated it. for once in his life, when something didn’t go right, he didn’t feel alone. 

jackson didn’t let go, even when mark was done. he held onto him tightly, even when mark started to cry because his stomach hurt something terrible and he felt like he couldn’t make it to his apartment alone, and yet jackson was there. jackson was still there even despite all his current shortcomings and mark had never had anyone there for him like that. no one ever came through for him like jackson was right now. no one ever did for him what he tried to do for others. no one ever felt the desire and carried through with repaying mark, even when mark felt like he didn’t need to be repaid. but jackson did. jackson stayed. 

“mark, where’s your key? i’ll carry you in and then you can get some sleep, okay?” jackson said sweetly, and mark didn’t think he’d ever heard someone speak to him like that. jackson spoke so carefully and gentle, as if mark was so frail that speaking even a pitch higher would break him. 

mark reached into his pocket to retrieve the key, trembling weakly as he set it into jackson’s hand. jackson didn’t seem to mind the movement, though. he just took the key without comment, not caring how long it took mark to unsteadily grab the small item and give it to him. he just seemed relieved to have it, carefully picking mark up once again and letting him lean against him. mark appreciated it and he settled his head in the crook of jackson’s neck again, trying to stop his constant tears from falling and starting to soil the collar of jackson’s shirt. if jackson minded, though, he didn’t comment on it. 

jackson opened the front door of the complex before speaking again, stopping in front of the stairs mark had been able to walk up himself millions of times– no matter what state he was in. today obviously wasn’t the same.

“what apartment number are you?” jackson asked again in that same sweet voice, and mark sniffled lightly before answering.

“305.” 

jackson moved immediately after that, although mark noticed it wasn’t in a rushing way. his movements were still slow and careful, walking up every step in a way that wouldn’t rustle mark too much. it made mark want to cry more, but he’d just started to slow down his previous outburst, so he did his best not to let it get to him.  
jackson wasn’t moving fast at all, but mark was so hyper focused on all the little movements and the sweet things that jackson was doing for his comfort that the trip up three flights of stairs didn’t feel long at all. it felt too short, if anything. but nonetheless, mark was glad to be closer to home and the comfort of his bed.

at first though, it didn’t process in mark’s mind that being home meant jackson was leaving. it didn’t process when jackson unlocked his door and carried him inside. it didn’t process when jackson asked if he should carry mark to his room or the bathroom, just in case. it didn’t process when jackson set him on his bed and then grabbed him a bottle of water from the fridge. it only processed when jackson had just pulled the covers over mark’s ghostly figure, brushing some sweaty hair from his forehead. only then, did jackson turn to leave, and only then, did mark realize that he was leaving. 

mark didn’t think. he didn’t know if had enough in him to think anymore. all he knew was that he wanted jackson. he didn’t want him to leave. so he reached forward and grasped the boy’s wrist with as much strength as he had left, staring right into the boy’s eyes when he looked over his shoulder, uncertainty in his gaze. 

“don’t leave.” mark croaked out, still holding onto jackson’s wrist firmly. he didn’t make any movements to let go. not until jackson let out a small sigh and looked down, turning back around towards mark. he stood there for a moment, completely still. and when he finally lifted his gaze, mark gave him a small smile before patting the space on the mattress next to him.

jackson seemed to hesitate for a moment, staring at the spot for at least a minute before finally moving and crawling over mark. he settled into the empty spot next to him, tucking his legs and torso under the covers, awkwardly laying there as if he didn’t have a reason to belong there. 

but mark thought he did. it didn’t feel wrong to have them there at all, and once jackson was calm and still, mark scooted closer. he wrapped an arm around jackson’s waist, not missing the way he tensed before mark rested his head on his chest. then jackson relaxed, too, and mark loved the way jackson moved his arm to rest it against mark’s back, securely holding him like he had already done many times before that night. 

mark never trusted people. mark never called anyone for help. mark never invited people over. mark never shared his bed, even with his previous girlfriends or boyfriends. mark had never needed someone, but tonight, he needed jackson. he felt like he couldn’t do this without him. something drew them closer, and mark didn’t want to be anything but closer. 

so he didn’t push jackson away. he welcomed him, and that night, he slept soundly in someone’s arms for the first time ever. 

mark died in his sleep. estimated time of death: 2am.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’m so sorryyyyy. DD;
> 
> i thought of this ending last minute and even though i knew it was evil, it flowed better and i just– i couldn’t help myself. it’s so bittersweet and i’m a sucker for bittersweet. also, i’m just evil. sorry.
> 
> thank you all so much for reading, though!!! i’m sorry it ended like this, but i appreciate every single one of your reads! it means the world to me and i love you all.


End file.
